Friday, March 30, 2007
Said and DoneI haven't been blogging lately. It's either becase I'm simply far too busy to find the time to blog, or that I have nothing in particular to blog about anyway. I'm so happy that I finally found the time to.
Last night, my blockmates and I culminated and celebrated the semester (neigh, the SCHOOL YEAR) that was. It was pretty hard to imagine that a year of torment, broken hearts, and teachers with white, acid-washed jeans was finally over. Up until now, the idea had not exactly sunk in. I keep telling myself that "It's over! We've done it! It's summer! We're JUNIORS. We're getting old." It always seems so surreal each time I put it to mind. Nonetheless, last night was a blast. Magic sing, frisbee, conversations, the trunk of my car, shawarma at 4am, guitars, Pancake House at 10am, laughters and smiles all around. It was a blast. I don't want to get all emotional, but these guys have made the past 2-year ride all the more worthwhile. I guess one of the reasons why the end of this year is so big is because it'll be the last time we'll officially be together as a block. Next semester, we'll all enroll in different classes and start to see less and less of each other. After two years of college, we'll be exposed to the vast unknown yet again. We'll meet new people, hang out less, and go through certain things in school with different people or by ourselves. I guess it goes both ways. Both good and bad. But for now, imagining it is like imagining what OrSem would be like a few days before college officially started.
And I guess, besides that, plain out too much happened this school year. Scholastically, personally, socially, and all other aspects of our lives, they were really shaken up. We were that pebble placed in a can and shook up for hours on end. It's a big relief that all of that's over now. And yet, a sense of regret and longing looms over it all as we let go to such a big part of our college life and prepare to face another school year.
Imagine. We're midway through. In two years, the exact time it took for us to begin this journey, we'll be finished with it, and thrwon into the "Real world" without much choice. Time is faster than the speed of light. It's frightening at times. Sometimes, you just want to stop it, take a deep breath, and just suck it all in. Take it in. Make sure you're still leveled. And THAT's exactly what summer's all about. Summer is short-lived immortality. And for some reason, the required six units I have for school this summer doesn't really matter. I'm working around it and I WILL have fun this summer.
In light of this, these are some of the things I promised myself to accomplish this summer:
1) exercise everyday
2) either join Rep, take a dance class, or take singing lessons
3) take 100 nice SLR camera photos
4) overhaul and fix my room, possibly re-design it
5) paint two nice paintings, or one huge mural
6) read at 3-5 novels
7) train Zara to be a housedog
8) try and get that columnist job at Summit
Wow. I'm going to have a busy summer.
Anyway.
This morning, in Pancake House, we were all about to leave. To end it, Carlos, one of my blockmates, said out loud to the group, "Guys, let's call it a day." Haha. Being the cheesy little prick that I am, I followed it up and said, "
No. Let's call it a school year." It may have been cheesier than the cheesiest, but it was a good way to end it. There was nothing left to do but look back at what we've accomplished, and just call it as it is. The 2nd year of our college life. Immortalized in our hippocampus [naks], it will stay and serve as one of those things that make good conversation pieces, or those things that you stare at the distance and smile about.
the adventure ended at 5:37 PM
Monday, March 05, 2007
Isn't It A WonderIt's random blog-entry day!
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I haven't written a poem in months. I must admit I don't know if I'm any good anymore.
The Silver Man's Identity CrisisThe world flicked up between two fingers,
as it spins indefinitely,
tearing air then punching ground.
The man on one side,
calm and steady,
shimmering as silver tries the gold.
He looks to the skies,
Hoping,
or kisses the dirt,
Praying,
trying ever so
Desperately
To see
The other side of the world.
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I just have to share that Hammer Night was a success. I have never been that wasted in my entire life. It was a good feeling. Weird feeling.
Key sentences: (Speakers not disclosed)
"Oh, Is [toot] still coming? Maybe we should like, call [toot]?"
"Get me a fucking plastic bag, you fucking bitch."
"Yeah dude, it doesn't matter. She can have my car if she wants it."
" NINE! How many? NINE!"
"Dude, where's [toot]? I think I wanna make out with her."
"You guys better fucking clean me up!"
"*Gremlin Laugh*"
"Dude, I'm not like you. I... have self-control."
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My morality seems to be taking a hit as of late. As time progresses, I seem to be doing more and more things that get me farther and farther away from God (Exhibit A: Hammer Night). I don't even get to pray at night the way I used to anymore. No more usual after-school trips to Church. Heck, no more communion every Sunday. I always said that my faith would never falter. I still have conviction in that. But if you can't live out your faith, what's the point of saying you have it? Faith isn't lip service. I mean, I do try my best and help people, make people happy. But I'm limiting myself to people I know: my friends (mostly just my friends) and family. I should also be reaching out to people who really need it. Like the kids in my NSTP. God, I wish there were still NSTP every Saturday.
Excuse me, I have to go scourge myself now.
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My birthday's in six days. I had the chance to do something great. To hold a Jollibee party for underprivileged kids. But I suddenly chose not to. It's not because my org said that it wasn't possible since there were safety issues etc. etc. at the hospital I planned to throw it in, it's not because rounding up the NSTP kids from Holy Spirit Elementary school would be quite burdensome, it was because I was too lazy and selfish to do any of it. If I wanted to, I mean, if I REALLY wanted to, I could've done it anyway, made special arrangements. But I didn't. I don't know why I chose to have the usual Triple D at my place (Dinner, Drinks and Dance) with friends and loved ones. It's going to be a lot of fun, I know. But it sort of hurts me knowing that I could've made something of my birthday for once.
Excuse me, I have to go put on my cilice.
(Self-pity behind me, if you can read this, then you're invited to my birthday thing at my place on March 10, 2007. Feel free to bring your friends. Hah! I'm so bipolar.)
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I've sort of been a pretty good student as of late though. I mean, procrastination and sloth-ness aside, I think I'm doing pretty well considering the kind of effort I've been exerting.
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Anyway, here's an emo thought. Ever had a day when nothing all that big happens but by the end of it you've forgotten who you are and what you're doing exactly? And then you suddenly feel so lonely? Well, lately, I've been having days like those. I don't know. Has routine and my mundane existence finally caught up with me? Weird. I think I need to do something absolutely new to keep me preoccupied.
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Oh, and everybody, check
THIS out.
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Out of words.
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That's it for now, I guess.
the adventure ended at 7:01 PM
