Sunday, August 20, 2006
opportunity costyou get a reminder that your biological clock is ticking [not matter how many times you press Snooze] when you start to make references to your own time. when you talk to younger people and start off your sentences with "nung panahon ko..." it's a sign that you're not getting any younger. i actually had it happen to me the other night, talking with some of my friends who're still in highschool. sure, the time lapsed hasn't really been that long, but still. i can't help the fact that my youth is slowly running away from me. "nung panahon ko, hindi pa ganyan yung mga teacher eh. yung caf, di pa ganyan. etc etc." crude. yes. but still, a quiet reminder from father time to stop wasting time.
every day is a day less that i can do the things i want to do. and there are already so many things i've given up, so many dreams and aspirations stowed away. it's the law of opportunity cost. it applies to everyone, everyday. it's not just an economical concept, it's universal. we sacrifice things, part of ourselves, things we want to do to be able to accomplish other things and be different/better people. because in an unfair world, we can't have everything.
my dad once told me, "don't hurry time. but don't waste it either." it's one of his proverbs that i'll keep with me and pass it to my own children one day. there are certain things in my raw existence that i've already squandered and i'm trying to get by without them. sometimes it gets difficult. i dunno. everyday i feel as if i'm wasting more and more and more time. as if i could be doing something better, something more absolute and meaningful. i'm certainly not a perfect person. i'm not a wise person either. i'm just a person. on good days, i smile and am happy. on bad ones, i sulk and pretend to be somewhere else. the bottomline is, i'm trying my best. i always am. i have a twisted sense of what my "best" actually is, but nonetheless, i'm doing all i can. i just hope i don't run out of time. hitting the "Snooze" button won't work anymore.
the adventure ended at 9:25 PM
