Friday, July 21, 2006
hermitstars looked at up close, through science, can never be as amazing as those seen by the naked eye: dots of wonder and beauty. it's so much more magical to think of these sparkly, bright little spheres that way rather than hot balls of inert and un-inert [?] gases. the thing is, there are just some things in this life one can only appreciate from a distance.
**
my sisters are on dates, my parents are out of town, and my friends are all busy. normally, i'd jump at the chance to go and do something crazy. but that's not the case tonight. i'm burned out. and so, i'm alone tonight. and i haven't been in so long. it's a weird feeling. something i haven't felt in a long time. and so, it feels new. it's like all my thoughts and feelings finally have the time, the silence, and the space to catch up with me. it's rather wonderful... in a lonely kind of sense. i'm not saying i'm all sad and emo right now, i'm just saying, things are clearer when there are no other people blocking your view, no other voices drowning your own, and no other thoughts clouding your own perception. i haven't heard myself think in quite a while. i've been so brash and reckless to just to be able to change that i've lost track of my progress as of late. this night is good for me. haven't devoted a night to myself in a while. no accounting girlfriends. no jamoves. no "steady hits." no words at all.
anyway,
there will always be decisions to be made. paths to be taken. opportunities to be passed up. some roads we are afraid to take so we desperately try to search for another route. a short-cut. and through our blind search, we suddenly realize that we've wasted more time searching than we would have if we had chosen the original path in the first place. and in some cases, we think of how much more convenient it would've been if we had turned right instead of gone straight. the thing is, we'll never know. so between the guy behind us honking profusely, and the bladder inside us, filling up slowly, what's really important is to keep our eyes on the road before us and listen to good music on the way.
**
i had my heights interview a while ago. i think i did well. i'm hoping to get in. cuz one thing i thought of while i walked out of that interview is that I WILL NEVER STOP WRITING. even if it kills me. no other activity gives me as much solace and peace as i write my seemingly senseless ramblings about this God-given life. and so, to all those who i'm sharing this with, i thank you. for having it in you to be interested in what i have to think and say. i'm a complex person, but i think if you read my blog often, you'll prolly know me more than i do myself. hehe.
Labels: Special
the adventure ended at 8:48 PM
